


ash.

by stardustgirl



Series: Rebels Oneshots [62]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Ashes Scene in Avengers: Infinity War Part 1, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Canon Divergence - Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Death, Episode: s02e21 Twilight of the Apprentice Part 1, Episode: s02e22 Twilight of the Apprentice Part 2, Episode: s04e13 A World Between Worlds, Ezra Bridger Needs a Hug, Heavy Angst, Hurt Ezra Bridger, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Kanan Jarrus Needs a Hug, Kanan Jarrus-centric, Malachor, Parental Kanan Jarrus, Post-Episode: s02e21-22 Twilight of the Apprentice, Sighted Kanan Jarrus, Sith Weapon, Survivor Guilt, The One On Malachor, in the temple, no happy ending, the snap, you know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-04 21:38:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18821239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustgirl/pseuds/stardustgirl
Summary: The Emperor makes it through the portal, and Ezra isn't able to prevent the weapon from being fired.





	ash.

**Author's Note:**

> TW: uhhhh read the tags y'all this isn't going to be fun

“Kanan?”

The kid’s voice is soft, and despite the ache in Kanan’s chest that’s growing worse by the minute, he turns to see Ezra, concerned about the sudden softness in his voice.  The kid’s stumbling toward him, eyes wild with panic.

“I don’t feel so good.”

“You’re all right.”  Kanan takes him in an embrace, pretending not to notice how tightly the kid clings to him, as if he would fall otherwise.

“I don’t...I don’t know what’s happening…” Ezra whispers, voice cracking as he begins to speak more rapidly.  “I don’t know….I don’t wanna go.”

The sudden panic that enters his voice sets Kanan’s nerves on fire, even as he knows exactly what’s happening, and knows that Ezra knows it, too.

“I don’t wanna go, M- Master.  Please. Please, I don’t wanna go.  I don’t wanna...go….” Ezra sags in his arms and Kanan sinks to his knees, supporting the kid as he lays back, face strained as he gasps for breath he should be breathing, that he has no reason not to be.  The kid’s last words are so soft they barely register.

“I’m...sorry….”

The kid fades to ashes in front of his eyes, and his last expression is burned into Kanan’s eyelids, a face frozen, contorted, in pain and fear and regret and I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m _sorry Kanan--_

Sometimes, a lot of times, he hates the Force.

Especially the echoes it leaves behind.

There’s a laugh, no, a _cackle,_ from behind, and Kanan turns to see the Emperor stepping back into the portal, away from the temple and the weapon that turned his _son to ash right before his eyes--_

“Why didn’t you just kill all of us?” Kanan asks, voice hollow.  He turns away from the Emperor, going to cradle Ezra before remembering there’s nothing there, no one to hold tightly against the world, against the Force.

“I believe in an order to things, as I’m sure many of my subjects have told you.  But do not worry, _Kanan Jarrus._  Your time will come.  As will the rest of theirs.”  There’s the sudden sparking of the portal, and he senses the Emperor is gone.

He forces himself to reach out for the rest of them; Maul was taken by the weapon, too, he knows, but he’s not sure who else.

No.

No no no no _no._

He can’t feel Sabine.

Can’t feel Zeb.

Can’t feel Ahsoka.

And Hera’s a blank void--for all he knows, she was taken, too, but something also tells him she wasn’t.

 _You’re just trying to hope.  Hope is_ useless. _Look at where it got you and Ezra and Ahsoka._

He makes himself stand, unsteady, and run a hand over his face as he scans the ancient battlefield below.  By now, the temple is starting to crack, the weapon having split wide seams down the sides. He’ll die if he doesn’t leave, he knows.

He can’t find it in himself to care anymore.

He pulls his commlink out, instinctively knowing Chopper wasn’t taken, that no droids were, but he’s not exactly sure _how_ he knows that.  He must have turned it on at some point, because Chopper’s warbling beeps finally come through, though he doesn’t remember doing so.  He swallows, clears his throat, swallows again. “I--” He breaks off, unable to continue as he looks at where Ezra’s body would be. His eyes shutter closed.  When he finally speaks, his voice cracks, unable to mask his desperation any longer.

“I need a pickup, Chop.  Hurry. _Please._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> This has been in my head ever since I heard what happened to Peter and it's taken me like a year to write oops. I might make this a full-fledged AU, who knows.  
> Edit: I made it a full-fledged AU.
> 
> Join the Rebels Discord [here](https://discord.gg/A9aCvce)!


End file.
